Mi persona ideal:
A Dominant who is naturally Dominant Wicked Classy knowledgeable who knows how to teach and use a male sub.
Training me to serve them.
Somebody who is self assured, and in control, witty, easy to talk to, sensual, educated, and wicked who is able to bring me to my knees with one simple word and look.
This sub looks to please the Dominant he serves, and to see them smile, to hear their words of praise when I have done well, or discipline me when I have not.


This has been a year of personal discovery for myself on so many levels.
I had the most wonderfully intelligent, funny creative, warm hearted and beautifully hearted Dommes I have ever had the chance to meet in person and became her sub online but was going to go rt and thought I was ready to do RT with this beautiful woman.
I loved watching this beautiful woman interacting with other people, I was so proud of her and proud to be with her.
Unfortunately I was found wanting on a number of levels, and eventually I scared this amazing woman away which I regret everyday. Now that I have had some time to look at myself and my actions, I am making changes in myself.
The experience has made me a stronger person and I hope a better person.
I want to grow and improve as a person.
1) I found that, I was selfish - i had to keep in mind that my partner is as special as I am and she too deserves to get what she wants above my needs. Everytime I Make a decision, I must put myself in her shoes to make the right decisions that takes her needs into account at all times. I must put in the effort to think about what my partner is going through and consider her feelings in every situation. Before taking any action or saying anything, the more I practice this the quicker l will be able to get rid of my selfishness.
2) To stop being selfish in my relationship, I need to ask myself two vital questions: “What do I need?” vs “What are my wants?” When people are being selfish in a relationship, they keep repeating, “I want…” They believe they deserve everything that’s the best and this slowly spills into their relationship, poisoning it in the end. In reality should be no "want".
3) When you dig deep, you will realise that you only have a few needs. The person you love tops your list of needs, therefore the key is compromising on your wants and focusing on your needs which is her.
4) Selfish people are awful listeners and that was me and something I am working on to improve. Every conversation between her and me should have been a 50-50 exchange of thoughts, emotions, and ideas. When you start caring, you will automatically be all ears to that special somebody.
5) In real life I am in control of a lot of people but I am self destructive in my own personal life because I hastily make bad decisions. Individuals suffer because they want or have to control others but they can barely control themselves.
6) It is high time I take a step back and trust the Domme and let her make decisions too. She knows what she is doing. As she chose me, so her choice was not that bad, she can hold the reigns and as an added bonus can also make me feel relieved from the unnecessary stress that I carry.

So setting out to break an intensely-rooted habit like selfishness in myself and in my relationship, demands stubborn effort. Slip-ups may occur but I am determined to makes these positive changes in myself.