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Profile of a Profile
Posted:Apr 21, 2017 6:24 am
Last Updated:Apr 29, 2017 2:30 am
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One of Alt’s stupidest quirks is that non-paying members cannot read profiles. It’s not simply annoying to the standard folk, but an extreme frustration to the paying members who keep on having to answer the same inane questions over and over and over again because “regular” folk cannot read profiles
But here’s the thing… standard members also can’t initiate private message contact. So if someone sends me a message, they also have profile reading privileges, so if they approach me asking a question that is blatantly answered in my profile, or goes completely against something I have written there, I am assuming one of two things:
Either, they are lazy and can’t be bothered spending five minutes to find out what I’m about, or, they read every single word and decided to ignore me anyway. Neither of those things makes me want to engage in a discussion with them.
The first thing I do when receiving a message is to check out the sender’s profile and I am repeatedly frustrated to find that they have failed to understand the basic concept of what a profile is supposed to be.
The definition of “profile” is: A short article giving a description of a person or an organisation.
Therefore… a person’s profile should be a short description of what they are, not of what they want.
Alt provides two fields in the profile section. The first is “Introduction” and the second is “My ideal person.”
Why oh why oh why can’t people differentiate between the two?
The Introduction section should be about YOU – it shouldn’t be about what you want in another person… it should be about what YOU have to offer. A person who reads it isn’t looking for a job vacancy to see if they are suitable for you… they are looking to find out whether you are suitable for them.
If your profile reads something like “interested in married ladies,” or “I want to abuse, use, and humiliate you,” most women are going to think to themselves, “okay, but what’s in it for me.”
As a woman who is pretty much only on here to chat, I am going to provide a few unbiased tips on how to write a profile that will pique someone’s interest, get their attention, and possibly wish to engage further.
Firstly, be clear about what you are in terms of the Alt lifestyle. For example:
“I am an old school Master who believes in harsh discipline and deserving rewards.”
“I am a loving Daddy Dom who wants to nurture and cherish his babygirl and provide spankings when necessary”
“I am a sadistic Top who enjoys inflicting pain on a willing masochist. My favourite implements are [insert implement of choice]. I also enjoy giving verbal humiliation.”
“I am a loyal and obedient submissive. I enjoy giving foot rubs and massages. I want to be trained to be a perfect slave/sexual slut/masochist.”
“I am a Domme looking who enjoys being pampered and worshipped. I take great pleasure in inflicting pain and humiliating my subs.”
By clearly defining what your role is the reader can then decide whether this is compatible with their needs.
Once you’ve done that, you want to engage personally. There is no need to provide personal identifiable information, but say something personable about yourself. Describe some of your non-kink interests. Do you enjoy fine wine and fine dining? Long walks? Chilling in front of the TV? What’s your perfect night in, or night out? Do you have a sense of humour? Don’t just say you have one, show it in your profile. Making the reader laugh out loud is a perfect way to break the ice.
Now that you’ve engaged their interest on a more personal level, finish with what a little bit more about what you have to offer in terms of availability, ability to accommodate etc.
Then once you’ve done all that… only then do you move on to the ideal person section.
Whatever you do don’t say something idiotic like “you,” and that’s it. That makes you sound indiscriminately desperate. Or saying “looking for a squirter/slut/etc” – that is objectifying and even someone who is into that will feel like you don’t care about them… only what they can offer you. It takes time and trust to build a relationship where you can objectify someone with care and love.
In that section be clear about what you want in terms of the type of relationship. For example, do you want a long term relationship, a fuck buddy, friends with benefits, a play partner. If someone wants a Dom for a long term relationship, they won’t want to get involved with someone who is only after a quick fuck.
Then go on to say what Alt role you’re looking for. For example:
“Looking for an obedient and willing female for long term relationship, to be trained as my slave.”
“Looking for a no-strings female play partner, for casual fun. Must be available to meet regularly, at least once a month.”
“Looking for a masochist for regular discreet meets. Gender is not important, but you should be able to take a lot of pain and humiliation.”
Finish by saying what other qualities you seek in a partner, both kink and non-kink. For example:
“If you enjoy wearing stockings and heels, it would be a bonus,” or “you must enjoy wearing stockings and heels as I will expect you to dress appropriately.”
“You shouldn’t take yourself too seriously, have a good sense of humour, enjoy zombie movies, and love having a cock in your mouth.”
And for the love of god… no self-respecting woman on the internet ever saw a cock pic and thought… ooh I want to get to know the guy around that.
Most women will look at a guy with a nice smile and quirky sense of humour and wonder “oooh… what other talents does he have.”
So if you want to be taken seriously, tell people about yourself, check your spelling, and remove that cock pic.
Of course, if you’re just here to be annoying… then good luck in your travels… you’re gonna need it
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