Valentine's Quote
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Posted:Feb 14, 2024 1:57 am
Last Updated:Feb 16, 2024 2:25 am 8724 Views
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“A starving heart will eat anything.”
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9
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Something True
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Posted:Feb 12, 2024 5:21 pm
Last Updated:Feb 22, 2024 12:26 am 8793 Views
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“Your body is not your masterpiece — your life is."
It is suggested to us a million times a day that our bodies are projects. They aren’t. Our lives are. Our spirituality is. Our relationships are. Our work is.
Stop spending all day obsessing, cursing, perfecting your body like it’s all you’ve got to offer the world. Your body is not your art, it’s your paintbrush.
Whether your paintbrush is a tall paintbrush, a thin paintbrush, a stocky paintbrush or a scratched-up paintbrush is completely irrelevant.
What is relevant is that you have a paintbrush that can be used to transfer your insides onto the canvas of your life — where others can see it and be inspired and comforted by it.
Your body is not your offering. It’s just an amazing instrument that you can use to create your offering each day. Don’t curse your paintbrush. Don’t sit in a corner wishing you had a different paintbrush. You’re wasting time. You’ve got the one you got.
Be grateful, because without it you’d have nothing with which to paint your life’s work. Your life’s work is the love you give and receive — and your body is the instrument you use to accept and offer love on your soul’s behalf. It’s a system.
We are encouraged to obsess over our instrument’s shape — but our body’s shape does not affect its ability to accept and offer love for us. Just none.
Maybe we continue to obsess because as long we keep wringing our hands about our paintbrush shape, we don’t have to get to work painting our lives.
Stop fretting. The truth is that all paintbrush shapes work just fine — and anybody who tells you differently is trying to sell you something. Don’t buy it. Just paint.
No wait — first, stop what you are doing and say thank you to your body — right now.
Say, thank you to your eyes for taking in the beauty of sunsets and storms and blowing out birthday candles…
And say thank you to your hands for writing love letters and opening doors and stirring soup and waving to strangers…
And say thank you to your legs for walking you from danger to safety and climbing so many mountains for you.
Then pick up your instrument and start painting this day beautiful and bold and wild and free and YOU. Paint this day beautiful, bold, wild & free.“
- Glenan Doyle
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18
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~Dawn
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Posted:Feb 10, 2024 1:34 am
Last Updated:Mar 8, 2024 8:12 pm 9308 Views
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Dawn is always such a forgiving time. When that first cold, bright streak comes over the water. It's as if all our sins were pardoned; as if the sky leaned over the earth and kissed it and gave it absolution.
― Willa Cather
Photograph Taken By: Me
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30
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Nice Guys Finish Last
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Posted:Feb 8, 2024 3:47 am
Last Updated:Apr 3, 2024 4:19 am 9876 Views
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Nice guys finish last,” is an age-old truism that we’ve all heard at one point or another in our lives. But is it actually true? Don’t women want a man to treat them with respect, and dignity, and to value them equally? Don’t we as feminists (and yes, I use the inclusive term ‘we’ because I consider myself to be one) demand these things? Don’t we desire to move away from the days when Neanderthals and chauvinists were allowed to run rampant when women had to suffer constant sexual harassment as a matter of course in the workplace?
Of course, we do, few things could be more self-evident than that.
So shouldn’t we be raising men to be ‘gentlemen,’ to be respectful, to treat women as equals? Shouldn’t men who strive to be kind, gentle, giving, and considerate be the ideal mates? And haven’t I, on this very blog extolled the virtues of the man who is hardworking, respectful, educated, and a good communicator?
Why yes, I have.
I mean, if that’s what women want, why wouldn’t good guys finish first all the time? As it turns out, they do. Overwhelmingly women seek mates who treat them as equals, with dignity and respect. They seek men who are faithful in their marriage and honest. So, the end of the post?
Not quite.
You see, for as much as women desire men who are all of the above for life mates, they seek something very, very different from their sexual partners. Ask any relationship therapist or clinical psychologist on the planet and they’ll tell you the same thing: women love their spouses deeply and sincerely – and they are (overwhelmingly) utterly unattracted to them sexually.
As it turns out, the scientific study of female sexuality is an extraordinarily complex subject. Stunning, I know. Professor Lorraine Dennerstein of the University of Melbourne determined that the loss of a woman’s libido as she ages is closely linked to a loss of interest in her sexual partner. Put another way: they desire sexless because they desire their partner less. Those same women consistently reported that they deeply loved and admired their partners.
So what gives?
Dr. Marta Meana, who is a clinical psychologist, Dean of the University of Nevada’s Psychology department, and widely respected researcher into women’s sexual functionality (and possibly more qualified to write about this subject than me), surmises that what drives female sexuality, above all else, is something that could be summed up best Cheap Trick’s 78 hit, “I want you to want me”: WOMEN PASSIONATELY DESIRE TO BE DESIRED.
That same soft, gentle man (not a gentleman) who she loves and feels secure around: the one who asks permission for everything, and is constantly obsessed with asking, “Are you sure you’re ok,” that guy is safe, but he is not sexy. Sexually, a woman does not fantasize about being delicately considered, she wants to be passionately desired, chased, and pursued, she wants to be the object of a man's unbridled lust – she wants to be conquered.
The real female orgasm? Being desired.
Now men, if you’ve ever read a harlequin novel (or watched an episode of True Blood), step back and ask yourself if that is not precisely the caricature that comes to mind. The strong, decisive, passionate, slightly dangerous, and lustful man. It’s almost comical how obvious the correlation is. Yet that same man who appeals to a woman’s lustful side isn’t necessarily the one who appeals to her desire for safety and comfort in a relationship.
And that’s the rub men: It will be your passion that brings her in, and it will be your security that holds her attention, but to develop her into that wanton slut you desire, who continues to explore with you and to grow in her submission, you must first provide the platform for her to build on.
You must be the foundation, the rock upon which her temple to you is built. Education, practice, communication, discipline, dedication, decisiveness, love, passion, and accountability: These are your tools. You must be ever vigilant to maintain your passion for her. To constantly reaffirm her place in your sexual desires with action and inventiveness; to constantly reaffirm your commitment to her soul with strong communication; her mind with leadership; her heart with consistent love, unending patience, and understanding; and to your relationship with stern discipline.
Committing your life to these principles and their practice is what will ultimately separate you from the cuckold husband, or the douche-bag wanna-be doms. You must be both the lion and lover. Do these things well, and her submission will blossom, fail and it will wither.
The choice ultimately is yours. Choose wisely.
~ Axiom
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11
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Exposed
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Posted:Feb 6, 2024 1:12 am
Last Updated:Mar 4, 2024 6:51 am 10130 Views
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He had told her, once, that he wanted to find everything there was to find about her, that he had no intention of settling for less. “I will uncover everything about you”. Then his voice and his eyes changed and his demeanor pinpointed, “I want to find every hot button you have. The ones you hide. The ones under glass. I’ll find them. I’ll push them. I’ll mash them, recklessly, until you’re a drenched, silken mess. I will bring us pleasures that will make it hard for you to look me in the eyes”. ...
She had looked away when he talked about pleasures that would make eye contact difficult. His sincerity in such matters was like a burning light, too bright. But he made it okay. “Look at me,” he said and she had no choice. He brushed his thumb across her cheek. “I want you to be exposed to me”, he said, softly, “do you want that?”. She got that taste in the back of her throat, like the one you get when waking from a nightmare. The muscles in her belly weakened and her inner thighs felt a small tremble. All she could say was, “Yes” and welcome his kisses.
-from Desk Job, body subversive
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6
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Change
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Posted:Feb 4, 2024 8:42 am
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2024 6:26 am 10602 Views
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She sits in the nexus of herself, her former and future, and considers her possibilities. To stay means to follow the light, the ordinary and the secure, the predictable and mundane. To go on is a move into the darkness, the unknown, where there is awakening and abandonment, surrender and salvation in the hands of another. It is scary there, but there is an enrichment greater than any gold and silver in the ordinary world.
*Unknown
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12
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Random Xpressions
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Posted:Feb 2, 2024 1:47 am
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2024 6:19 am 11334 Views
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I may have screwed up as a wife and sometimes as a sister, a , or as a friend because I don't always say or do the "right things". I'm spirited, I have a smart mouth, I have a hot temper, I have secrets, I have pain, I have scars because I have a history. Some people love me, some like me, and some people don't. I have done well in my life. I have done badly in my life. I have wasted a lot on things and people not deserving of my time. I’ve been fooled, bullshitted, used, manipulated and hurt. I’ve trusted, believed, and given 2nd, 3rd & 4th chances. I feel invincible one minute and stupid and unworthy the next. I go without makeup and I don't get dressed up sometimes. I am random, I am passionate and I am silly. I have learned & grown. I won’t pretend to be someone I am not. I am who I am, you can love me or not. But if I love you, I will do it with my whole heart, and I will make no apologies for the way I am
~M
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22
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The Power Of No
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Posted:Feb 1, 2024 2:55 am
Last Updated:Feb 1, 2024 4:40 pm 10073 Views
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It is just two letters long and yet one of the most powerful words in the world and both empowering as well as inspiring. The little word I am talking about is the word, no. I will admit there are times I struggle to say this tiny little word. My fearful leader at work (aka the boss) knows that where there is something to be done to push the assignment to my desk and friends/family know when there is a challenging task ahead to give me a call and I will lend a hand. I take pride in being that ‘go-to’ person, being counted on but even though it has been a hard lesson to learn, I have also learned the value of saying no and sticking to it. My growth and comfort in saying no has also shown me that saying nay is not only powerful in our daily vanilla life but is just if not more important in the lifestyle.
As a dominant, naturally, I want to have a happy submissive partner, and just like every relationship, a good and creative partner will know the ways to ask for things to get what they want. It is very much human nature to do that and to want to give approval but saying no is simply needed at times. One of the most memorable moments in a D/S relationship can be the first time the d-type tells their partner no. I believe that when a dominant is saying no, they also need to explain why they are expressing disapproval and it is never acceptable to sound like a disgruntled parent with the “because I said so” reason. I also feel that not only is it important to share the why behind the negative decision but to always listen and hear your submissive partner if they disagree with your decision. Just because the dominant is the leader in the relationship, it does not mean error-free, and sometimes the no might not be the best choice. So value your partner when they disagree and be open when you discuss the why behind the no.
Many submissives often struggle with saying no because they love to please. There are submissives that this does not apply to as they do not have a problem drawing the line in the sand in the career world or with family/friends but more often than not a submissive’s desire to please causes them to overextend and have their plate full of commitments big and small. This overextending can lead to higher than needed stress levels plus they struggle with making time for themselves. It is one of the most valuable things a dominant can assist their submissive with is finding that balance allows them to still be the valued go-to person at work and the MVP for family and friends while also letting them have the “me time” they need to keep their batteries fully charged. A Dominant does not need to micromanage or schedule their s-type’s life but works with them to let them know it is okay to decline an event or to set aside time for themselves. By working to help balance time crunches, a dominant can help guide their partner to find a better balance on the beam that is life.
One of the most important nos that a submissive should always remember is that being submissive never means the right or ability to say no is taken away from them by anyone for, any reason. A submissive always must give their consent. If a person, place, or thing makes them uncomfortable they can and should say no. Just because someone is submissive it is NEVER acceptable to bully, force, or take advantage of them. All dominants must respect and adhere to the word no when a submissive says it.
Being told no is never something anyone wants to hear, it is often one of the most important words we can learn to say effectively. No matter what your role in life or kink not being apprehensive in expressing no can help achieve a better life balance. Additionally, submissives never lose the right to say no nor does being submissive lessen the meaning of no. As the saying goes, no means no and this must be accepted and respected, a power exchange dynamic, never take away this right, so mind your Ps and Qs by respecting the nos of others.
*Archive
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4
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Something To Ponder
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Posted:Jan 31, 2024 1:12 am
Last Updated:Feb 16, 2024 2:26 am 10096 Views
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A little bird was flying south for the Winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.
While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.
The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Morals of the story:
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut!
Photo Taken : By Me
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19
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Heaven & Hell
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Posted:Jan 31, 2024 12:57 am
Last Updated:Feb 23, 2024 2:18 am 9454 Views
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The mind is its own place, and in itself, can make Heaven of Hell, and a Hell of Heaven.
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19
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